Married life in an ambush 10

From "Seven Year Itch" to "House of Flying Daggers", marriage is two people's war, between husband and wife the highest intelligence and character of countless biggest contest. Some say it well: "When the wife standing in the kitchen, silently brush the plate, when a man holding a newspaper, facing the TV a daze, a time to time there are bodies everywhere is 'ambush' of war, had been quietly started. "at the press in recent interviews with 20 pairs of couples, they talk about the following stories and life scenes, his tone was calm and vicissitudes of life.


　　The first one ambush:Gap is a step by step to expand. Between men and women do have a gap, such as women like Roman Logistic grams, men liked to Normandy; women like fashion, men like to wear fashion models. For couples, the fun in life, values, interests, hobbies and so lapse, not only to allow two of the world more colorful, but also just able to meet that "complementary" pattern.

He fears that in addition to these gaps, but can not find a common taste between the two o'clock. Weekend nights you look at your fashion magazine, he waited at the front of the TV soon as shouted: "I ×, how one does not enter!" You called him a madman, he said you know what to enjoy life. Each felt the other tasteless, both sides maintaining a spirit of superiority. As a result, two of the world to the finally turned into you and a magazine, he and a TV.

A fashion-conscious wife and her eyes "soil were dregs," the husband is going to get along very dangerous, if not timely exchange and communication, there is no mutual assistance and adjustment, will one day generates a stream of inexplicable aversion love, then look at where he would not be a pleasure to the eye.

　　2nd ambush:Emotional life of a lack of color. Some people say that the love between husband and wife after all, was to degenerate, and by the beauty of romantic love evolved into flesh and blood relationship. This is because the marriage than the actual love and lengthy. Thus, under such a real marriage, emotional life in the "tired" state, no more "innovation" has become the root of the BU much rice and firewood in a coarse lines.

The husband is no longer to buy my wife roses, he thought back to a bag of salt and more meaningful. His wife to know when cooking and hold stock, a few months down the gas meter can go a few words; barefoot for two years at home can save a pair of slippers; on the balcony to take the telescope to see a neighbor's television once a month can save electricity; The only thing is she does not mean mouth all day long Laolao verbosity you should not do, you'd better do ... ... to lose emotional replaced is the life of machinery, stereotyped, and cumbersome.

In fact, If men experienced more wind and rain, it will depth; a woman the day for a long time if the home will bring the charm mature woman mature men and mature woman who's charisma, is definitely a beautiful landscape, it is important should be know how to go in the right areas show know how to find new ways to express mutual love and feel, not only because there is a common married life, let it all lost their sense of color.

　　3rd ambush:"Bedroom matter" has become the unspoken difficulties. Put it on the last one certainly does not mean it is not important. Some may think that: married, sex has become less important. Indeed, family life, we must first think of daily necessities as well as the kids go to school, by their nature do not know which corner to go into just, and this is probably a lot of Chinese women are willing to live with no climax and loyalty reasons. But we must not forget that sex is also a measure of modern life, regardless of how the escape, a harmonious sexual life is bound to affect other aspects of life.

If the marriage is the delivery of the body and soul to each other, then it can be said physical demand for marriage in a most basic needs, the body's happiness is the most fundamental happiness, loss of all of this, marriage, happiness will be compromised. Please do not feel embarrassed for the body's desire to boldly state your feelings and expectations of the state, followed each other in good faith to adjust, so that the body is still a deep fascination with each other, so happy with Time.

Love a person of life to the music; and other loved ones who have a perfect sex, yes to the music in to the music. In the sexual aspect of the right to not give up the pursuit of happiness is not getting us into a mere hedonist, on the contrary, it is only a means to better serve the real-life flavor and services. For the overnight couples relatively speaking, conquer the soul of perhaps the other side of the body from the conquest began.

　No. 4 ambush:A hasty marriage, leaving the hidden dangers. "Marriage" from literally seems to be a stunning woman, they find people to end up with. In fact, many couples have proved that our ancestors had the word is not lightly made up, and one was dizzy with love by immediately have to run to the Civil Administration, thinking quickly locked in this person. Can be set on the chain until they find that people are not suitable for them, has become tasteless, but wasteful to discard the tasteless one.

Did not take enough time to try to fully understand each other, did not take enough time to sober thinking about the relationship between the two has become the biggest rush left for the future of marriage risks. Sometimes, the "lightning war" marriage will be love, to some of the false impression of the confused. For example a one-year of marriage the wife asked her husband to accompany him now go to a mall, the husband has always wanted to say no, the wife understand: "You used to go shopping is not quite like it?" Her husband said: "It was not the You Zhuidao Shou! "

In order to please the other side and wronged themselves, I believe that this kind of thing men and women in love do no less. Married, and has been, the fox's tail will naturally be exposed. While others from the hasty marriage is not yet psychologically ready. One has done his father's 25-year-old man's words particularly sad: "Sometimes I can not help but think, I still like a child, I do not yet processed blink of an eye have to pay the other two personal life is like a like a dream, really feel very confused ... ... "

Maybe we do not need, as some people say "love for two years, living together for three years," as for the pre-marriage living together is scheduled for a rigid standard, but only in understanding each other, to be prepared psychologically, and also have a certain degree of foundation in reality, the married life will have a good start.

　No. 5 ambush:Too busy, cold the other side. Jin Yong's novel "Snow Fox", when his beautiful wife Southland Miaoren Feng Tian Guinong embrace losing, she Shenqingkuankuan against Tiangui Nong said: "You told me about her husband's name should be reversed before distribution. He would be owned by farmers till the land, you really are people in the Phoenix. "Let Southland say this love language, because some heroes only know to practice all day long Miaoren Feng Miao his sword, his wife it does not really happy, he has never had control. Many men have become the modern version of "Miao Renfeng," while many women probably no exception, "strong woman" Nature is also a busy out.

Perhaps someone will have pity: I am busy, are not they all for this family? Yes, no doubt you are busy motives, but also believe you do in the "busy work", but life is more important thing is that it's process, rather than abandon the current price in exchange for the future. On the other hand, if you really for this family, in the end the family is broken, then the undertaking to the success of what is the point? Each other's concern and care, anytime, anywhere to give the other half of love, a happy married life is the fundamental long-term.

To be sure that the feelings between husband and wife is like gardening, as both sides continue to irrigate and fertilize the intention is not to wilt take care of it. Can be hole-y pilgrimage invincible hand "Miaoren Feng," and finally was unable to retain a beloved woman, can not but say is a great regret.

　　Chapter 6 ambush:Child became a "third party."

Many people love their children compared to the crystallization. In modern society,

This product is often only appear once, but there is also a time later than before, so when the belated little life has finally opened his eyes, he merely glanced to the parents, that moment affection of human nature in the immediate all burst forth.

Love their children is not wrong in itself, and sometimes as a new mother, wife, due to busy to take care of baby while her husband have been neglected, in fact, is understandable. Only after some time, you can not forget the other half around the same need your love, this love and on a child's love is different, it will be simpler and more tolerant. For example, you buy milk for the baby, while her husband did not forget the way to buy a shirt or a razor, the other side will be very satisfied.

　Chapter 7 ambush:Life more and more plain, accustomed to each other's position. There are also plain wrong? No, some say that "it is really not always pan out," Well! But psychologists say, for many years, there are two kinds of inner conflicts that have plagued human beings: on the one hand that people always want the lack of security in this world for plain stable, but the other hand, the flat would mean being bound, this choice is based on the cost of lost interest in life. So, I am afraid that apart from the temple of enlightenment and monks, no one can really put up a long dull life.

More importantly, some couples live together in a long time together, and often used to this plain, gradually over time on the breeding pairs of lovers out of a sense of disregard. Days, numbness in the monotonous repetition, in the eyes are no longer a romantic and passion, even if his wife the night transform eight sets of underwear, her husband would not have any new discovery. While another introverted husband, said: "My wife always thought I was like after work, look at the newspapers, in fact, nothing I could do was to do so, I would also like to go out with her walk, a bustling downtown of."

May be married, and there are more things to face, is no longer possible as every day like crazy when in love, however, a small pleasant surprises enough to create a calm feeling Road, a beautiful lake filled with waves.

Article 8 ambush:Frustrate each other's expectations. It is said that the number of cities, window fan, its inside many kinds of people will be able to find the motivation and reasons for marriage. Regardless of each person to pick up the red text that how different reason, one thing is the same: that is, expectations for the future, for the will to live together in which their own personal expectations.

But life often can not, as we wish, do you expect him to fortune, perhaps he was only taking 2 a day money to buy lottery Zhang; you look forward to his successful career, perhaps he can only after work to explore your leadership employment levels. So, you finally could not resist, and you say: "You see people, and we also married ... ..." severe and perhaps even to one: "I really did marry you blind!"

Think about it from another angle, maybe you are this man is not the best, but it may be the most suitable for you and is a favorite you. He loves you, he'll give you whatever the scope of where the greatest happiness and joy. If for a millionaire or a cause of too proud a man will not give you the same love? God knows.

In the eyes of sociologists, the expected fall is the humor generated by one of the channels. For example do you expect a hen to give birth to an egg, which after the bottom has fallen to a box of soap, people will laugh. When you are disappointed expectations of a loved one, you will have to wear a smile? In fact it contains your smile, his tolerance, understanding and encouragement.

　　Article 9 ambush:Add up the damage. Some places there will be conflicts, husband and wife day and night relative, of course, not least finally in sight, noisy quarrels are inevitable, not noisy hand, is not normal. However, the quarrel and hurt each other, there is a difference. If the two sides in anger expression is just different points of view, this is a fight; if would also like to look the other way, an insult to human dignity, trampled on what each other's self-esteem, it is hurt.

Quarrel be able to "bedside quarrel foot of the bed and" hurt but it will leave the shadow of the other party may not say it, the heart which it may be difficult to eliminate a lifetime. Do not understand is that many husbands and wives always so gentle on the outside, often close to people at home it actually hurt very deeply. Maybe they think: When I was closest to the people who do not vent? But did not expect each other's feelings is: even my closest people are so hurt me hurt again and again ... ... When the accumulation of one day it will forming a kind of hate, but also a deeper love, hate, the more you cut.

Friends can tolerate your shortcomings, but will never tolerate your shortcomings may be causing harm to him, between husband and wife is also true, really.

　Article 10 ambush:"Suspicion spirit" of the flooding. The more we care about things the more it will be tight. Married a long time, into the middle-aged husband to a man "a flower" period, then it sticks, "Flower" will away from home "quietly open?" Anyway, first of all get the point of anti - . For example look up his wallet to see if his cell phone, read his collar and smell the smell, do not even remember the performance evaluation assessment of his bed ... ... be able to find traces of it is another that, anyway, the only way to make the hearts of stone not always be so hung half-empty.

On the film said that what "Shenmeipilao" is concerned, to the husband playing the vaccination is also necessary. The problem is you can not be too hard, every day for a needle one can not stand. Some men may be properly originally, but was pushed off the rails you step by step, the edge, "you can not always trust me? Well, I'll come to a real action, how the?" Do not think that rebellious teens The child will dry, hurry, and so-called "middle age" man as well as "explosion".

A husband's right when he said: "My wife is so smart so attractive a woman, said calmly, even if I am really sorry to her place, I think I may be tempted to confess to her." So, First of all I believe he has locked in the charm of her husband's heart, followed by the maximum extent possible to give him a trust, the last with wisdom changed from passive to active, to his "bad thoughts" nipped in the "embryonic state." This is a smart wife and a confused wife in the face of this matter differences.